Mann ki Blog #10

Hey what’s going on? It’s me again with another edition of Mann ki Blog. I hope you are all doing well. Please include leafy vegetables in your diet. I have many things to share with you today including an interesting encounter with a monkey. I updated my Aadhar photo recently. It was, contrary to what one might expect, a hassle free procedure. You can also try. It appears as if the second wave of COVID-19 has abated. That’s good news. Let us try and keep it that way. Some random facts before we start: On this day (26 June) in 1997, the first Harry Potter novel “Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone” was published in the United Kingdom. Also on this day (26 June) in 1498, the emperor of China patented the tooth brush. Now let’s get going.

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You must have seen/read news reports about the recent developments in the Israel – Palestine conflict. The news made some of my friends anxious. They were fighting like anything on our WhatsApp group about which side to support and why. One fellow was saying that our current Prime Minister supports Israel. I agreed with him because he is the first Indian Prime Minister to visit Israel (July 2017). Another fellow contested that our Prime Minister favours Palestine. I agreed with him also because he is also the first Indian Prime Minister to visit Palestine (February 2018). This back and forth continued for quite some time. After about three days, it began to seem as if the majority (of the WhatsApp group) was convinced that our Prime Minister stands with Israel and that all Palestinians by default hate him. Some left wing vs right wing discussions that I am too dumb to understand.

People seemed to be convinced and the debate almost ended on this note. Then one girl pointed out that during his 2018 visit, Shri Narendra Modi was bestowed upon the highest Palestinian award of the “Grand Collar of the State of Palestine” which is basically their “Bharat Ratna”. The majority and the minority (of the WhatsApp group) did not know how to react and the whole thing came to a stand still. Before it started all over again, I read about the news of a Delhi YouTuber being arrested for tying a dog to balloons to make it ‘fly’. What a legend. I shared the link in the WhatsApp group and thankfully, it distracted everyone thereby solving the long standing Israel – Palestine conflict. I mean, not the actual conflict. Just the one we were having on our WhatsApp group.

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My dear readers, 15 June 2021 marked the one year anniversary of the Galwan Incident. But more importantly, 14 June 2021 marked the one year anniversary of the untimely death of Sushant Singh Rajput. A national tragedy. Even after one year, we still have several unanswered questions (about Sushant. Not Galwan). What is Rhea’s role? Nepotism or drug mafia? Karan Johar and Mahesh Bhatt? Was his death a PR stunt for his last movie that released on Hotstar? Sadly, it seems that we may never know. But the biggest question I have my dear readers is this – when is Netflix making a show on Sushant’s death? I mean how much time does Netflix need? They have resources to make movies with Abhishek Bachchan (Ludo) and Bobby Deol (Class of ’83). They spend money to make whatever “Lust Stories” is. But they still have not announced a show on Sushant. Ridiculous. Please make it happen Netflix. I am sure there is more than enough footage with Republic TV if you need.

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Now for the monkey encounter that I teased in the intro. So, a few days ago, after having an early dinner me and my wife went upstairs on to the terrace for a stroll. Lovely as she is, my wife baked me a cookie with chunks of white chocolate. I was carrying the cookie in a small plate, yet to take a bit as it was still warm. Soon after we began walking, a monkey casually walked in and blocked our way. It was a Rhesus monkey. For a second, we stood face to face having no idea what to do or how to react. Since the monkey stood near the stairs, we could not escape without having to cross paths. We were cornered.

You might not get that impression my dear readers but people who know me personally would attest to the fact that I have a very sharp mind. Quick thinking is the name of my game. As we stood there, I could sense the helplessness in my wife and her silent cries for help. I immediately swung into action and placed the small plate, along with the warm cookie, on the floor. As expected, the monkey’s attention was on the cookie and it walked towards it, giving us space to escape unhurt. The brief standoff was tense but it ended peacefully, like Doklam. My wife immediately felt eternally grateful for my presence of mind and my bravery. I mean, she did not say that explicitly but I could clearly sense the vibes.

While this should ideally suffice for a happy ending, what followed was something more convoluted. You see my dear readers, after the standoff, I began to wonder whether or not the monkey liked the cookie. I raised this query with my wife and needless to say, she was also curious (perhaps nervous) to know. While my curiosity had no personal stakes, it was evident that my wife had a lot to lose in that scenario. It would definitely be embarrassing (for her) if that monkey rejected the cookie. We went back on to the terrace to check but the monkey was still sitting there. We decided to wait till the next morning to check once again.

Rhesus Monkey (Macaca mulatta) is listed under ‘Least Concern’ in the IUCN Red List of Threatened Species. However, for those few hours, it was of utmost concern for us. I spent the next few hours trying to learn about rhesus monkeys. I came to know that due to their closeness to humans anatomically and physiologically, they have been used extensively in medical and biological research. They were used in the development of rabies, smallpox and polio vaccines; creation of drugs to manage HIV/AIDS and even in the study of embryonic stem cells. STEMS CELLS my dear readers. One of these primates was launched on a suborbital spaceflight in 1959 and became one of the first living beings to travel in space and return alive. Actual SPACE. Can you believe it?! After concluding that the monkey upstairs was actually some kind of a secret genius, I started to panic. The monkey’s opinion mattered.

Life is strange. One minute you are walking with your wife planning to eat a cookie and the next minute you are researching about rhesus monkeys.

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Before I forget my dear readers, I have to confess something. Even though I am not very political, I get agitated when I read critics lambasting Nehru for all kinds of things. I mean you have to be critical of leaders yes, but sometimes you also have to give credit where it is due. I am of course talking about his relationship with Edwina Mountbatten. Why does no one give credit to him for such a contribution to the national cause?

In February 1947, Louis Francis Albert Victor Nicholas Mountbatten became the Viceroy of India with a mandate to oversee the British withdrawal. Along with five first names, the guy also had a wife: Edwina Cynthia Annette Mountbatten. Being the maternal uncle of Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, and second cousin once removed of Queen Elizabeth II, he was the very symbol of colonial oppression. Do you know what Nehru did to that guy? He made Louis Francis Albert Victor Nicholas Mountbatten’s wife fall in love with him. Haha.

In an interview with Karan Thapar in 2007, Lady Pamela Hicks, Mountbatten’s youngest daughter told the following about her mother’s relationship with Panditji:

“…a very deep love. The kind of love that the old knights of old [had], a chivalric love really. Nowadays everybody assumes that it has to be a carnal love, but you can have just as deep an emotional love with two like souls in a way, people who really grow to understand each other, and to be able to listen to each other and to complement each other and find solace in each other.”

“My mother died in Borneo, working for Save the Children Fund and St. John Ambulance Brigade, and she died suddenly in the middle of her work. On her bedside table was a packet of Panditji’s letters.”

I believe it was Pawan Kalyan who said in an old Telugu movie that “winning a war does not mean killing the enemy, it just means defeating the enemy.” Panditji took winning the war to a whole different level. Yes, Sardar Uddam Singh killed Michael O’Dwyer but did he make Una O’Dwyer fall in love with him? No. Yes, Yuvraj Singh hit six sixes in an over after fighting with Andrew Flintoff but did he make Rachael Wools fall in love with him? No. Jawaharlal Nehru accomplished something that arguably no one else in history did and instead of calling him a womaniser and what not, we should shower accolades on him. It was a contribution to the national cause.

Let me reiterate that this is not a political opinion my dear readers. I don’t intend to demean any of the Prime Ministers that came after Panditji. I am just saying that had Jawaharlal Nehru been the Prime Minister or India in 2020, Doland would not have brought Melania with him to the Namasthe Trump event. Just saying.

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That is all for the tenth edition of Mann ki Blog my dear readers. I cannot believe that this is already the tenth edition. Three of them are actually readable. Not bad. I will see you soon with another edition. In case you have not read already, I wrote a small piece about my father (Arrogance) a couple of weeks ago. Do read if you have time. No pressure. If you have been following my addictions, I am glad to inform you that I managed to stay away from Coke for 36 days now. I intend to keep going. You fellows stay safe and keep eating healthy food. No need to go all vegan. Just keep the junk food away for now. Oh yes, talking about food, the Rhesus monkey upstairs ate just the chunks of white chocolate and left most the cookie. That was rather unexpected and left both me and my wife puzzled. We did not know how to interpret that and finally decided not to worry too much about the whole thing. After all, how smart can a dumb monkey be? I mean, look at that face:

Thanks for reading.

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